ABOUT FOCUS ON THE FAMILY
HELPING FAMILIES THRIVE
Focus on the Family is a global Christian Ministry dedicated to helping families thrive. We provide help and resources for
couples to build healthy marriages that reflect God's design,
and for parents to raise their children according to morals and values grounded in Biblical principles.
We're here to come alongside families with relevance and
grace at each stage of their journey. We support families as
they seek to teach their children about God and His beautiful
design for the family, protect themselves from the harmful
influences of culture and equip themselves to make a greater
difference in the lives of those around them.
No matter who you are, what you're going through or what
challenges your family may be facing, we're here to help.
With practical resources--like our 1-800 Family Help line,
counseling and websites--were committed to providing
trustworthy, Biblical guidance and support.
THE PRODIGAL GROWN CHILD
How can we best relate to our grown child who has completely rejected his Christian faith and upbringing? After graduating from high school he moved in with his girlfriend and became involved with drug and alcohol abuse. Your hearts ache to reach out to him, but you don't want to appear to be condoning his lifestyle. What would you do?
LONGING FOR A LOVING RELATIONSHIP
You long for a warm, close, emotionally safe relationship with your son or daughter which is completely understandable. God designed moms and dads to feel this way about their children, and when the relationship doesn't turn out as you hoped and expected it's only natural that you should be grieved.
At the same time, you're wise to set boundaries, enforce limits, and communicate clear messages to your child about Christian values and Biblical standards of behavior. You need to find creative ways of holding that position while also assuring your adult child of your love.
THE PRODIGAL SON OR DAUGHTER
The parable of the Prodigal Son (READ LUKE 15:11-32) can provide you with an instructive model in this regard. As you may remember, the father in Jesus' story didn't assume responsibility for changing his son's heart and mind.
He understood that there were only two things he could do in response to the young man's ill-advised choices: pray and wait.
He prayed and waited with patience until the son finally "came to himself" (Verse 17).
And when at last the son came home freely confessing the error of his ways, the father "RAN" to meet him "while he was still a great way off" (Verse 20). You should be ready to respond with the same degree of eager love and compassion at the first sign of repentance on your child's part.
WHAT CAN YOU TRY TO DO
Is there anything at all that you can do to help your child start moving in that direction... to open a crack, however small, in the wall of their resistance to God and his Christian upbringing? Not directly. But perhaps you could enlist the assistance of some objective third party.
Is there anyone you know to whom your child might be inclined to listen to? A family friend, perhaps, or a relative, a member of your church, or your youth pastor, or the senior pastor?
TAKE TIME TO BATHE YOUR LIVES IN PRAYER
First and most importantly... Pray for your child and
ask the Lord to guide your path in everything you do.
(Read and Meditate on Scripture PSALMS 25:4-5) Don't rush into a situation that is not ready to be dealt with... keep praying until the Lord gives you a clear and open door. Then you can pray for the right person or persons to help "open the door of communication."
All help has to be bathed in prayer before you ask someone to be of assistance. It would also be helpful to put your adult child on prayer lists and have trusted Believers praying with you, for you, and for your child.
GUIDANCE FROM TRUSTED CHRISTIAN CONFIDANTS
An older male for your son, an older female for your daughter is the best way for Christians to counsel unless another Christian adult couple is willing to work together with your adult child.
Any Believer acting in the role of a mentor... should be someone who you know your child trusts and whom they don't perceive as a threat... could be a great help to you in this situation. Anyone who can speak with your child, providing them with carefully considered food for thought and listening compassionately to your child's responses, may play an important role in keeping up the lines of communication.
PROFESSIONAL CHRISTIAN COUNSELORS
Keep in mind that the Prodigal Son wasn't able to "come to himself" until he had come to "the end of himself." It's possible that your child has not yet experienced a sufficient amount of personal loss to be willing to listen to anyone... just yet.
If you can't find or don't know of anyone who can offer help, consider the following. When and if they reach a point where they are open to re-evaluating their life-choices, you can encourage them to call "Focus on the Family."
Christian counselor referrals are available through the ministry of "Focus on the Family." This article is part of their ministry and was found at the URL below that you can click on for more
Copyright © 2010, Focus on the Family.
To request a conversation with Focus on the Family’s Counseling Department, call 1-855-771-HELP (4357) weekdays from 6:00 a.m. to 8:00 p.m. (Mountain Time).
Focus on the Family is an American fundamentalist Christian organization founded in 1977 in Southern California by James Dobson, based in Colorado Springs, Colorado. It promotes social conservative views on public policy.
Christian Belivers - We will continue to tackle the
issues on our Prodigal Sons and Daughters.
BELOW: People Need the Lord - Each and everyone of us
Need Jesus Christ if we want to see changes in our
families and friends. Our Unsaved loved ones
Need the Lord. Take time to PRAY as you listen
and realize, we must give our lives to PRAYER
for those who Need the Lord!!